Traffic Lights and B52s
by akaeve
Summary: Ziva gets totally and utterly drunk. Based loosely on the words of a U2 song Vertigo


**Traffic lights and B52s.**

Apologies to Bono and U2

"_Unos, dos, tres, catorce!"_ everyone shouted as Tony, picked up the shot glass and downed the green liquid.

"Wow, Midori, haven't tasted that in years. I thought it was going to be Chartreuse, knew it wasn't liquid tooth paste." He said slamming the small tumbler down, on the table.

"This, liquid toothpaste? I do not know this one." Ziva questioned looking amazed at the upright figure of Tony.

It was Tony's birthday and he had decided since it was a Friday night, and he had requested the weekend free if possible, he was going to celebrate, big style.

"Liquid toothpaste, my little desert palm tree, is Crème de Menthe. You should try it sometime." Tony offered.

"Are you suggesting that my breath is bad?" Ziva asked angrily, glaring at Tony.

"Come here and let me see." as Tony made a lunge for Ziva.

"Hey," as she pushed him away, "I should maybe try this liquid toothpaste, but what did you say that other green drink was?" she now questioned, manoeuvring herself now sideways from Tony and over towards Tim.

"Midori, it's melon flavoured, and rather tasty. Would you like to try?" Tony offered.

"Ever tried a traffic light?" Abby now ventured looking at Ziva.

"I do not go around eating such things." Ziva replied puzzled "But I have tried to run one once, but I was chasing a bad guy." she added, looking perplexed, the American language was beginning to bother her again.

"Traffic light? Of course, red, amber, green, Midori, Amaretto, and then Cranberry liqueur or Grenadine, Galiano and Midori" Tim answered before wandering off.

"Prefer the B52 myself" Gibbs added, now beginning to smile.

"B52, Boss?" Tony replied looking at Gibbs in a new light or was it a haze.

"Grand Marnier, Irish cream and Kahlua, done just right they also float on layers." Jethro added.

"Here try this," as Tim handed Ziva a shot glass, layered with the colours of a traffic light, "knock it back in one." he ordered.

"_Unos, dos, tres, catorce!"_ Tony and Abby shouted, as Ziva looked at the pretty layers, put the glass to her lips and, downed the drink.

"_Yea, yea, yea, yea, yea, yea," _the team roared, all except Gibbs who was keeping a fatherly eye on the proceedings, he sipped the Jack.

Ziva began to smile, that hadn't been too bad, "Can I have another one please? No I'll have what Gibbs said pleasssee." she slurred as Tim bought and brought another drink. Ziva began to smile even more. There began a warmth in her body. It emanated from her stomach and slowly crept up to her brain. She didn't feel drunk just warm and cosy.

"_Lights go down it's dark. The jungle is your head. Can't rule your heart. A feeling so much, stronger than a thought_," as she felt, the liquor take effect. She hadn't felt such euphoria since…..as she began to hear the song.

"_Your eyes are wide and though," _she heard Tony say, "What did you give our Zivvvvvvaaaaaa, Probie?"

"Nothing," Tim replied, "Well just the traffic lights and she did ask for a B52." He continued, "I thought it wouldn't exactly do any harm, but now she does seem to have gone subsonic, and definitely heading for the stratosphere." As they watched Ziva begin to dance and play air guitar.

"Now that is my gal." Tony oozed, "Anyone got a camera?" looking about.

"_Your soul it can't be bought,"_ as she thought back to Somalia. "_Your mind can wander_." as she began to make up her sitrep for tomorrow, she was somehow going to have to write down all that had happened."Was this how it felt to be so intoxicated?" she wondered. She felt so high.

_"Hello hello"_Tim said waving his hands about in front of her face, "Can you hear me?"

"_Hola"_ she thought, smiling at Tim. _I'm at a place called Vertigo_, as she fell into the music "_Donde esta?"_ a voice in her head questioned. "_It's everything I wish I didn't know. __**But can anybody hear me**__?"_

"_I can't stand the beats_" Ziva said to herself, as she looked at the person who she thought was her, but didn't feel like her in the gantry mirror, _"I'm asking for the cheque." _Ziva said now looking_, _seeing Abby handing over $20 to Tim who placed it with his money. Why was Abby, _The girl with crimson nails_. And why had she, that would be me, Ziva hiccupped, never noticed that she "_Has Jesus 'round her neck"_ and why was she still dancing to the music, no _Swinging to the music."_

_It's everything I wish I didn't know, but you give me something, I can feel, feel_as she took hold of Gibbs arm as he led her out of the hot stuffy dance floor and into the cool of the night.

As Ziva lay out on the grass looking up at the night sky, she thought, "_The night is full of holes_" as she smiled at the thought, _"As bullets rip the sky_. _Of ink with gold._"

They twinkled in the heavens as she listened and thought, _"Boys play rock and roll and they know that they can't dance. At least they know,_how funny they appeared, like wobbly rubbery puppets." as she tried to stand.

_"Hello hello_" she heard Tony say to her now weightless body,

"_Hola I'm at a place called Vertigo. Donde esta?" _Ziva heard herself whisper.

"_Hello hello._Stay with me Ziva," Gibbs whispered, "Don't pass out."

"_Hola. _Oh yes she would stay with the Boss if he asked her_."_she smiled, "He was really quite attractive in the light of the night.

"_We're at a place called Vertigo" _as she heard the music in the background filtering through the ringing in her ears."_Donde esta? Lights go down and all I know. How to kneel, kneel,"_as she bent down on the ground, and was violently sick.

_"Yea, yea, yea, yea, yea, yea, yea, yea, yea, yea, yea, yea, yea, yea, yea, yea" _was all she heard as she passed out.


End file.
